Private Message to Seamus Finnegan

[alt_harry]

Hi.

Are you doing okay? Because you didn't seem okay earlier.

And I thought

I don't know.

Anyways.

I know today wasn't easy. For any of us. It was a lot to take on, and I know how hard it can be to do stuff when you know important people are watching and they want things to be a certain way. If that makes sense.

Comments

[alt_seamus]

I didn't want to do it, but when that one muggle defied me, I thought I'd better, because if you let them think they can get away with it --

I don't know.

Madam Umbridge said she understood why I'd decided to use the cruciatus curse and that she admired my mettle. Professor Sinistra didn't say much of anything, though. I don't think she was happy with me but she hates me anyway

[alt_harry]

Yeah. I don't know either sometimes.

Like the second task of the cup. All I knew right then was that Delacour was hurt, and I didn't even think that she'd be taken care of. I didn't think at all. So I went for her instead of the Ouroboros.

[alt_seamus]

I knew I had to do SOMETHING.

And I knew it had to be big or they'd just keep pushing.

And afterward I felt like I'd done the right thing but the way they looked at me -- and I don't mean the muggles, I mean some of our classmates.

[alt_harry]

Maybe.

Madame Umbridge was pushing too. For us to do things.

And yeah, I think some people were surprised. And they didn't like seeing it.

[alt_seamus]

Yeah, she was, wasn't she.

She said I showed 'mettle.'

[alt_seamus]

It's hard to be a Gryffindor sometimes. I mean our whole House is viewed as a little suspicious, because SO many traitors have come from there. (It's not as if there haven't been Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw or even Slytherin traitors, too, it's just ... fewer.)

Anyway I try really hard to be a good Gryffindor. And 'mettle,' you know, that's like 'courage, but for the right things.'

[alt_harry]

I don't think you're suspicious. Just so you know.

Sometimes I wonder what it would've been like if I stayed sorted in Gryffindor.

[alt_seamus]

You and ALL the Gryffindors.

Not that people really talk about it, but everyone wonders.

[alt_harry]

I didn't ask to be re-sorted, you know.

But sometimes things just sort of happen and you don't get a say in it.

[alt_seamus]

Are you glad you're in Slytherin, though?

[alt_harry]

Yeah.

But it can be hard too. In a different way. And sometimes I'm not very good at it.

[alt_seamus]

I think you'd have made a good Gryffindor.

[alt_harry]

I would have been proud to be one.

[alt_seamus]

I don't like the way Madam Umbridge giggles when she talks, though

[alt_harry]

Yeah. I know what you mean.

[alt_harry]

And it's okay.

That you didn't want to do it, I mean.

[alt_seamus]

Thanks.

I didn't want to. But once I did --

It felt bad but also good, I don't know how to even describe it.